now it's mr. negative review to you, sucka.

barbara streisand---how? why? those are what come to mind when i think of her. well, that and schnozz. music so white it negates color. souless, bland, and yet pointless as well. can't act-can't sing--what can she do? plug up goodwill's with records and play jewish boys i guess. and beaver bump with oprah.

sam the sham and the pharaohs---wooly bully makes about as much sense as slamming you hand in a car door and is only slightly less painful. weak tex mex riffs for 60's frat guys--they had one song and put out 5 records. put them back in the sarcophagus and call me when it's at the museum.

nickelback--they are so bad that i almost side with the taliban because releasing this on the world makes america the biggest villain in the world. a band your mom and dad can say "is pretty good". string together some cliches--take a bad grunge rip-off and viola--nickelback. makes ugly kid joe seem awesome. music for people that buy generic twinkies and try to tell you that they are just as good.

skrewdriver---the ultimate meathead band. probably were art students but try to act "working class". if you are at a show and a big guy with a shaved head and horrible neck tattoos beats up a little guy 5 to 1 it's a skrewdriver fan. ameobas have more intelligence and a right to life than any skrewdriver fan. music for dumbasses who hate "french fries" cause they're foriegn.

the adolescents---once named a song kids from the black hole. must be one that swallows talent because these hacks flail and wail like the descendents siamese brother that was cut off ala "basket case". except belial was sexier and smarter. the musical equivalent of cold chinese buffet rice--icky//dry and forgettable. they all turned into drug addicts---but no drugs can wash away the embarassment of this hoo-ha. i wish the kids from the movie "kids" would smack these dolts with a skateboard in the head a few times.

social distortion---mascara wearing rolling stones devotees that pretend they are punk. the probable cause for the horrible rock-a-billy look--you know the one--flame tats--dumbpadour--chain wallet. more generic than a case of sam's cola and has the same effect on your stomach. been playing the same song since around 89 and their fans are so stupid thay haven't figured it out yet. the one time i wish heroin would have won.

the beatles--four long haired fops from england in the ultimate "right place, right time story". the beginning of the end for fun rock and roll for many years. they did drugs and got "serious" with songs about raccoons and octopuses.the start of everything you hate about rock music--arenas//concept albums//marketing//merchandise. put all of the blame right here peeps. music for one legged women and japanese widows to bank on. still banking on guitar hero because they have the best p.r. people ever---and because "digital simon" is about all their fan base could handle.