negative review day 3

that's what i'm calling it from now on---keep the requests coming and i'll keep hating.

mozart---ok, first off--no one alive has ever heard mozart.sure you've heard the world's biggest (member wise) cover bands do it--but dude was dead before your great great daddy suspect was even born. buffer music for public radio and scared to play real jams college stations. a guy so lame "pinto" had to play him--was "flounder" busy that week?his entire written music isn't even as cool as the falco jam about him. and it sucks.

x---take a homeless chick bukowski wouldn't even do--add a mechanic//rockabilly guy//and a monkey and you have x.roots music for transients and hobos. at least they were smart enough to ditch ray manzarek--they have that going for them. as soon as they quit drinking and i quit drinking we all broke up. they were a lot prettier drunk. if this is poetry e.e. cummings is a grammar teacher.

type o negative---"my name's peter and i live up to it".after writing semi-nazi jams for carnivore and agnostic front ole pete decided he'd try to get laid with these low-rent vampire jams. taste the blood of suckula is more like it.the scariest thing about them are their fans--and that playgirl spread--this music probably works like barry white at magic the gathering tournaments.

Guns and Roses---what was left after aerosmith sobered up.not musically, i mean on the bathroom floor. when i hear them being hailed as classic i want nuclear war to happen--it makes me lose faith in humanity. . probably the worst singer and biggest asshole//pussy to ever draw breath.never--i repeat never has anyone ever believed the hype more than these dumbasses.
#2 on the pissing on our legacy chart after kiss. how can you possibly back anyone who is scared of vince neil? music for camaro owners//marlboro smokers and overall buttplugs. crappetite for posing.listening to anything after appetite is worse than voting for sarah palin in 2012.

monster magnet---there are only 2 things that stop me from liking them--my balls. failed punker tries to make himself over as a "stoner rock god" and rips off hawkwind and 60's jams he knows none of his carpet cleaner huffing fans have ever heard. he should call his records 'guess the riff" because they are all jacked. wyndorfe is like the 16 year old at your junior high except he's too dumb to get 'socially promoted" to high school. they'd like to be el caminos--but they are more like mini-vans.

Bucket Head---mofo doesn't even do chicken right.i'm not going to waste a lot of time on something as pointless as this guy. too lame to be in a band--too dumb to move out of the chicken coop. this is music for shred heads who can't get along with anyone else. finger lickin dumb!

Manowar----music made by oiled up loin cloth wearing men for hesher dudes who call everybody "fag". you try to figure it out--i don't want to. i will never be this bored.

Smashing Pumpkins---waaaaah waaaah waaah! lurch has a sex change boogie for the pre and post op set. dude has less to say than a mime but it doesn't stop him from putting it out.supposed to be art rock but there is no rock involved.cheese and wine go together forever!the world is an ashtray.

ac/dc---one riff wonders led by an aussie midget and a guy taking a perpetual shit. a singer that makes nazareth sound like opera drug down to the ground by riffs found in chuck berry's trash bin. the only thing dumber than ac/dc are the people who bought their new cd at wal mart. bon was the smart one guys--choking on puke is way cooler than wal mart. for lyrics they just take an old sexual innuendo and wrap it around something they found scrawled on a rest area bathroom wall. come to think of it--brian johnson is the epitome of "here i yell broken hearted.....trying to shit but only farted".the highway to hell no.

abba---makes pat boone look like james brown. souless soul music for people on the bon-bon diet. whack harmonies added to classical pop disco that is just as horrible as that sounds. the spice girls//milli vanilli of the 70's--you get what you deserve people.