negative review returns!

belligerent bendajos--a lunchbox of rock, buddig meat--some kool-aid and a twinky. like the music suicidal tendencies w would make if they were from plainfield instead of cali. thrashy crossover like a sourpatch kid mixed with a chocolate now and later mixed with a zagnut. yeah, you shouldn't do that but it's either that orfree i.p.s. lunch.

dave and rae--yuppie house band for restaurants i don't go to or the patio on the nights i never went there. so lame they can't even put cover songs on their website. not much there to even hate really, it's like hating cake donuts or something.

u2--verily i sayeth to thee--thee most pretentous of all. makes mother theresa seem apathetic--more causes than facebook and your aunt nancy combined. i wish the potato famine was still going on every time boner opens his cock holsters. any note you hear from edge's guitar was struck back in 97 and is just now coming from the delay pedal. rattle my nuts and hum!

deezen--if this is garage rock then shut the door and turn on the buick. music for people to eat boogers and sniff farts too---the musical equivalent of getting andy capp cheese fries instead of hot fries.if piggy from lord of the flies cloned himself 5 times it would be deezen.

off balance--for 2 years i thought the name of every single song was either indianapolis hardcore or represent. music to knock your grandma's teeth out with .a bunch of football players wearing basketball jerseys and shorts and makes as much sense. will probably try to fight me for this but when they do i'll just say "isn't that freddie madball" and point and run off when they look .got a tattoo of brass knuckles on their knuckles and a tupac rag and a can of sparks.

spin doctors--if you wanna call them lame--well go ahead now. and if you want to listen to them--then you're dumb as fuck now. it's mealy mouthed hippy crap like this that really gets me hacking on sacks.too lame to be hippys and too white to be funk--i mean yeah, that is like saying i'd rather die of hepatitis b than c. stupid hat and sox and sandals are required. brains are not.
 
apostle of solitude---their songs are longer than sarah jessica parker's face. imagine if tony iommi was on thorazine instead of weed now slow that down. now mix in a solo that would make wino check his pocketwatch. they recently got some new members that make them real contenders--yep, heavyweights! they are currently touring freight terminals near you!

lil' 'wayne--probably the ugliest muhfugga i have ever seen. the only words i can make out are money and money. has the i killed a guy tattoo but you know his studio ass ain't killed nothing but some eardrums and a gallon of robitussin. i feel sorry for kids but sorrier for me--cause i have to live with the dumbfucks that like this shit.

pantera (down, superjoint ritual etc. etc.) anything with noddy mcsmackhead is gonna suck. some say dimebag lucked out before he had to rejoin asselmo again. look at the cover of metal magic and tell me how all of a sudden they turned into camo rebel flag confederates--i know, it's because they are dumb as fuck. meathead rock for the jocks who called you gay for liking misfits but if noddo says it's okay they get the tattoos.it's not thrash and it's not good.

  hatebreed---they are so generic their albums should be white with "hardcore" stenciled on them. it's like if you took (what little) soul sick of it all had completely out and were left with just the formula.plus if you are a vj on mtv-- just shut the fuck up.

giraffe eating lions--the only band in town that are sponsored by a helmet company. short bus hymns played by people who got kicked out of jerry's kids.kinda jesus lizardy but even more mumbledy.they play a lot because they can't do anything else but collect disability and chase shiny things. corky's favorite band and they did the soundtrack to" bill" and  "bill on his own" starring mickey rooney. a---gooooo.

motorhead---wart's up? old hippies change drugs and make with the bigbang whallop. chuck berry on roids over and over and over. another band in the "we made the same record for 20 years" gang. they brag about being loud which is okay until you have to wait for the chorus to know what song they are playing. at least i know no matter how low i ever sink--at least i am not someone who had sex with lemmy.